Life is all relative and relatives can make your life great

If cousins are truly your first real friends, then I’m the most fortunate person on this planet.

In May, I attended the funeral of an aunt and spent a wonderful afternoon reconnecting with almost all of my cousins on Dad’s side of the family.

I recently attended the wedding of my first cousin, once removed — in other words, the daughter of my cousin. It was in Iowa, and I got to see some cousins from Mom’s side of the family.

For a lot of my readers this seems a little odd as many of them see their cousins every day. They go to the same schools and churches or even work together. Their families came here, set down roots and over the years formed the communities we all know.

My parents met in 1948 when Mom came by train from Iowa. Dad had come two years earlier from Cadott, so I always had to travel a bit to get to know my cousins. Fortunately, both Mom and Dad felt family ties were important, and we were able to form early friendships with our cousins.

The wedding was a great celebration, and my last two aunts on Mom’s side were both able to be there for the event.

Life is a little different when your parents and most of your aunts and uncles have passed. It takes a little more effort as a grownup to come visit the cousins you knew when you were kids who now have their own adult children.

It’s funny how we look at ourselves as not being very old, and yet we’re probably the same age as our parents were when we started marrying off. I remember thinking how old they were then and yet, I’m that age now.

Although some things have changed, some things stay the same. We all thought we still owned the dance floor — specializing in group dancing. We danced to songs the “kids” had never heard.

One “kid” — a 27-year-old — commented that he didn’t know a particular song and quickly added, “Why would I? It’s not like I’m 50!” The average person would have felt old, out of touch and reasonably offended. I chose to be happy he thought I was only 50. See, there’s always a bonus if you’re willing to bend your perception a little.

In between the dancing, we were able to catch up on our lives and the significant events we had missed over the years due to time, work or other family duties. Throughout it all was the general sharing of love and admiration for each other because of the friendships we formed in our youth.

It was also great to see my aunts; one was Mom’s sister, and the other was Mom’s sister-in-law, the grandmother of the bride. Mom’s brother was the sibling who was most like her in temperament and demeanor. Hard to believe he passed in 1989 and Mom in 2013; they both would have loved being at this wedding.

As we cousins rifled through the comparisons, we spent a good deal of time sharing our perceptions and memories of them. We were able to conclude that whatever good qualities we shared were made possible through their influence. We’re still wondering if there’s anyone we can cast blame on for our faults.

If life is just one big teachable moment, then this weekend with my cousins taught me is that life is good and it’s even better when shared with relatives who know and love you.