Confessions from a disorganized mind

I’m guessing there was something I missed either in school or just traveling through life in general about learning how to break down a large project into manageable steps. It’s the difference between being organized or disorganized.

Some people have an easy time with this. They’ve learned to look at a large project and break it down into small steps that are easily accomplished, ultimately reaching the desired goal. Fascinating concept — but so out of my wheelhouse.

I’m trying to narrow the time period to when I should have learned this skill and I’ve narrowed it down to the fourth grade.

My aunt taught fourth grade throughout most of her teaching career. I remember chatting with her when I was in college about some of her experiences. She spoke lovingly of one student who couldn’t seem master the task of putting things away when he was finished.
Rather than putting away his books from one class he merely added the next book for the next subject on top of whatever he had been working on. Apparently having everything visible supported his sense of purpose, but ultimately it showed he didn’t have the ability to compartmentalize the day. When all his books were out, his day was at the end.

My aunt had to assign other students the task of helping him put everything away at the end of the day so he could begin his next day with a fresh start.

I only have to look at my dining room table to see that I never learned the concept of finishing one thing before starting another either. My table holds for me the beginnings of many many projects, mostly involving filing or shredding, which have no hard deadline. Where others see chaos, I see important things that need my attention — some day — just not today.

I’ve picked the fourth grade because, in addition to the story my aunt told me, I also know that the fourth grade was a big turning point for me.

We had a new to the school teacher and for some reason that inspired me to come out of my shell. No one I know today believes I was ever a shy child, but I can assure you that I was.

I also had speech therapy once a week during math class which I conveniently blame for my inability to add or subtract. Numbers are still a mystery for me and interruptions to my schedule just means I’ll get back to something at a later time. Thank goodness words fall within my comfort zone so I can share these revelations.

Being a visually oriented person I need to see things out and about or I forget they exist. My computer desk top has always been what others would classify as a mess, but to me it’s like being surrounded by friends who are just a glance away.

I tried to make files to put all my precious treasures in but I seem to do that sparingly and almost never go back to the original train of thought. This means I have several files holding pictures, but none of them are in places where they would be easy to return to should I need them.

One day I was looking for a certain group of pictures and was having a devil of a time trying to locate the correct file. They weren’t under “Pictures” and they weren’t under “Miriam” and they weren’t under “Miscellaneous.” I could go on forever listing the files they weren’t in but that would just show how creatively my mind works when categorizing a simple subject like pictures.

I never did find the pictures I was looking for until about a year later in a file labeled “Keep” in a file marked as “Minutes” in an organization I no longer belong to. I’m so grateful that my curiosity lead me to open the file. Had I just deleted it because I thought it was no longer important I would have never found the pictures.

For those who might care to know, I did put the “Keep” file into the “Picture” file and actually deleted the file of the info I no longer needed. Baby steps to be sure, but a great feeling of pride for actually finishing a task came over me.

The question remains, should I rejoice that the lost was found or am I in serious need of an assistant to organize my desk top, my table, my life in general.

Miriam Nelson is the news editor of the Wittenberg Enterprise and Birnamwood News. Readers can contact her at mnelson@newmedia-wi.com.